TNT - You’re Dynamite

The song T.N.T. by ACDC has never meant more to me than it does this morning. One of our best friends in the world died suddenly on Thursday and to say we are in shock, devastated, and heartbroken doesn’t scratch the surface of how everyone who knew and loved him is feeling right now.

Tom loved the song T.N.T. in part because his initials are TNT and the truth is, Tom was simply a dynamite kind of guy.

To know Tom was to love Tom and everyone who met him felt welcome and connected to him. Tom left a footprint on everyone’s heart and he’s someone you couldn’t forget if you tried. He was full of love and so kind.

Tom was a wonderful friend and he was an amazing husband, dad, grandpa, and sibling. Family and friends meant everything to Tom and he would do anything for someone he cared about, always willing to lend a helping hand. And never have I seen a guy more proud of his wife, kids and grandkids.

Looking at pictures this morning, I was reminded of just how amazing TNT was and is. Tom loved life and oh the fun we had. We did everything with Tom and Jill and for us, they were not just the dearest of friends, but they were part of our family. Honestly, our entire family loves Tom and the hole sitting in our hearts and home is huge.

Tom loved to tell stories and yes we heard some of them more than once. But with his charm, grin, and enthusiasm to share every word, people couldn’t help but listen, laugh, and smile.

Tom loved his Rum and Cokes, White Russians, and a really good beer. He loved adding a little bit of Carolans Irish Cream to his morning coffee and enjoyed reading a good book and snoozing in the chair.

If there was water close by, Tom was either sitting by the water, or diving in. He loved the water, boating, sailing, jet skiing, fishing, swimming, and snorkeling. He had a love for Leech but also the ocean and the North Shore.

We spent endless amounts of time at Leech Lake and have so many wonderful memories up there. The cabin and Leech won’t ever feel quite the same.

Live music was part of Tom’s life and whether we were going to the Minnesota Zoo, First Avenue, Excel, Moondance or traveling to Chicago to see Cold Play, there were so many concerts, I’ve lost count. Music really was good for the soul all these years and it will be needed more than ever with the loss of our dear friend. To keep it simple, Tom loved music and to have fun.

Tom loved taking his dog Jaxson for walks every day and even all of our dogs loved him. One of Tom’s favorite lines was, “dogs love me.” And they did.

Tom and Jill recently bought a camper and took an amazing road trip in the fall. He loved adventure and I wish there could be so many more road trips for him to take.

I could go on and on about Tom because for me he was bigger than life. I will miss his silly texts and how he made me laugh. He was always my back-up when my husband was traveling. I didn’t even have to ask and he would let the dogs out, shovel snow, or check in on me. He was Neal’s best pal, road trip buddy and Tom was always helping Neal build or fix something. Tom recently told me, he was the only handyman I knew. And there’s some truth to that. Tom was that guy. A guy you could count on through the good times and bad.

There are no perfect words to capture such a devastating loss. And while I write about loss and grief every day, I’m struggling to process the loss of a man that made my life and so many other people’s lives better because he was here. The world lost one of the best people I know and for us, life will never look or feel quite the same.

Like so many losses in life, the void is huge. Nothing can replace someone who mattered so much. Someone you love and care about. I can’t imagine life without Tom in it and my heart aches for his entire family, and my sweet friend Jill.

Tom will be missed for so many reasons and I wish this nightmare wasn’t real. I wish we were sitting up at Leech Lake right now, sipping a White Russian and watching the sunset like we have so many times before.

My heart is broken and once again, my perspective on what truly matters shifted overnight.

Let go of the petty stuff and don’t let anger or frustration cast a dark shadow over all of the good things in life. Take nothing for granted and appreciate every moment you have.

Don’t ever pass up a chance to tell someone you love them and spend as much time with the people you love as you can. Hug your loved ones a little tighter and remember that life doesn’t come with promises or guarantees. Life can change in one single moment in time and when that moment comes, life changes in the most unimaginable ways. It’s the part of being human that hurts and to lose someone you love shatters your heart and changes parts of who you are - without warning and in an instant.

We will all find a way to move forward in life and we will honor Tom every hard step of the way. And like I write about so often, what choice do any of us have. But it will hurt and I will always be a little bit sad to live life without our friend. I have to believe he will always be present every time we go to a concert, go to Rascals in a snowstorm, or up to Leech Lake.

So here’s to you Tom. Cheers to a life well lived. I will miss your stories, silly grin, infectious laugh, and big hugs. I will miss hearing your voice, your text messages, and all of the fun times we were supposed to have in the years ahead. Thank you for being such a wonderful friend and know that you will always and forever be loved and missed. Maybe we will still sing that Karaoke duet in another life one day.

I love you TNT. You really were and are dynamite.

With Love-

michele